What I Learned This Week - 10/24/25

1.  It’s fun to randomly visit my kids and drop pregnancy tests into their bathrooms to cause drama and remind them I’d always find a way to make them understand parenting. #DadThings
2. If you listen to Billy Joel's song, "Piano Man" with the context that the piano man is actually unknowingly playing in a gay bar and all the staff are waiting to see how long it takes him to figure it out, you will absolutely lose it when he sings, "man what are you doing here". #CantUnhearIt
3. I don’t know why “treat puzzles” are limited to dogs and cats and I’m sure there’s a much larger market targeting husbands. #maybe #MeLikeTreatsAndPuzzles
4. Best t-shirt observed in the airport this week celebrating spoopy season read, “If you’re trying to scare me, I am terrified of boobs”. #HeScreamedWhenILiftedMyShirt
5. Apparently I’m the only one who has adopted the amusing Thoughts of Dog pronunciation of “spooky” as “spoopy”. #NeverGoingToStop
6. I really want to know the context of the conversation that was being held as I entered the elevator ending with, “..if a junk drawer was a person it would be him”.  #ThereWasNoLaughter #HopeItWasntMe
7. I’m not the only one that asks a question that turns into a meeting with seven other departments. #NotFeelingBetterAboutIt #StillNotAnswered
8. Some people don’t know that when I get too busy in life I either forget or don’t have time to post these minor factoids. #Sorry
9. When you volunteer rehabilitating wildlife you learn that each organization has a patient that is adored for being special for some reason or another and ours is “stupid turkey”. #OMGCrickets
10. No matter what anyone says, you cannot get dried rat gut stains out of a t-shirt. #ItsAPaintingShirtNow
11. I don’t know what occurred in my life that caused waking up feeling well rested feels like a bad omen. #ImSupposedToBeTiredWhatNow
12. I’m not the only one that experiences a dream so real that it takes an entire day to recover from it. #PrettySureItsTheMatrix
13. I’m hoping this is the year that grocery stores and gas stations get in on the Black Friday craze. #NotLikely
14. According to a coworker, the worst part about getting into a fender-bender is getting out of the car and having to meet a new person. #FeelHisPain
15. Every time I lay down, I can’t believe I ever considered going to bed as punishment. #NotJustMe
16. Things I never thought I’d ask and get a positive response to from my wife, “want to go for a five minute ride to see if we can see a comet for less than a minute?” #WorthEverySecond
17. According to a recent study from Harvard, eating while watching TV or scrolling your phone comes from the medieval era of dinner entertainment. #JustMadeThatUp #NotEvenTrue
18. I don't know if Medusa's leg hairs were tiny snakes and this consumes more of my brain than it should. #OrWorms
19. There are few feelings better than helping someone catch their first fish on a flyrod. #GoDumpTruck
20. You don’t realize just how important your dominant hand is until you go to the restroom and can’t use it. #OMGSoHard

What I Learned This Week - 9/19/25

1.  Kids today find out about school snow closures via e-mail/text, they will never understand the anxiety of getting up at 5am to watch the bottom of the TV like the NYSE. #Victory
2. My friend refers to his spouse as his candle because she is hot, brings light to his world, and if ignored will burn his house down. #maybe
3. My wife believes, no matter how true, I'm not allowed to refer to a wake as a “going away party”. #LessMorbid
4. I may be the last generation that can remember the distinct sound the glass doors made on the stereo cabinet. #TheSoundOfGoodThingsAboutToHappen
5. For future texting reference, referring to something that is over-the-top elegant, the word is spelled, “B-O-U-J-E-E”. #VoiceToTextNightmare
6. Three-beer-Lee finds a teeny-tiny TV mounted to the side of an RV displaying the Denver Bronco game, far more entertaining that he should. #StupidLatePenalty
7. Operation manuals that come with new technology rarely demonstrate to the reader how to actually operate the thing you just purchased, but a different version of the thing you just purchased. #SoManyFeatures
8. Having space granting one the ability to turn around 360 degrees in a shower is actually a luxury you didn’t realize you had until you are in a position you don’t have it. #NotGoodAtYoga
9. It’s amazing that I live in a time when someone asks me if I’m ready for the fall, I have to think hard for a moment to determine if they meant “autumn” or “the fall of society”. #maybe
10. I think “the best thing since sliced bread” needs an upgrade to modern times, from now on I'm using “the best thing since skip intro”. #GameChanger
11. My wife has decided we need to role play more and her favorite scenario is “sexy librarian” where she gets to read and tells me to shut up. #NotEvenTrue