What I Learned This Week - 8/15/25

1.  At some point in my nearer-than-I’d-like-future, I will catch my last fish and not know it. #YesItAppliesToAnythingButThisHitsMeHarder
2. I’ve reached that time in my life where I must decide whether or not I’m going to pretend not to know something just to make my life easier. #TooTiredForThisShtuff
3. Apparently if you’re in a workshop group, editing a document and someone who is tech illiterate mangles the document so badly that someone exclaims, “oh god, what have you done?”, you’re not supposed to say, “yeah you’re not a pink pony girl and you don’t dance at a club”; you’re only supposed to think it. #OrSoHRSays
4. According to ChatGPT, the word that describes subscribing to a podcast that deep-dives subreddits and then following the subreddit about the podcast to get the behind the scenes is called, “stalking”. #maybe
5. I did not know the GPS tracker I bought for my wife’s cat was bidirectional until she “accidentally” called our phones at 2am trying to get her collar off. #SleepDeprivedConfusion #ReadTheFinePrint #CatDidItOnPurpose
6. If the cat that lives in your house suddenly starts peeing on everything but in the cat box, check underneath all your cabinets for a six-foot long bull snake, just sayin’. #WeirdSoundAtDoor #OrYourCatIsJustAJerk
7. You can tell which restrooms have no or poor cell phone service without checking your phone by just observing if there is graffiti on the stall walls. #OrPeopleStoppedCarryingPens
8. It should probably concern me more than it does that ChatGPT has a retro mode that only uses pre-2021 data and algorithms. #DontTakeAIAtFaceValueAndYoullBeFine
9. AOL announced it is ending its dial-up internet package in September and I honestly had no idea they offered other services than internet. #TheyDoWut
10. After a long think, the answer to the question of “do you ever make-up items for this list just to publish the list” is no, and when I get to that point I don’t make a list - that's why sometimes it can be a long time between posts. #KeepingItReal
11. According to a bumper sticker on a car in the parking lot, which was parked between two spaces, parking spaces are like underwear and are only meant to be occupied by one. #irony
12. I'm at the age where most Kellys I meet have never heard of the Kelly song from Cheers. #sadface #KellyKellyKelly #MineMineMine
13. Most Kellys will look at you in horror when you sing the Kelly song to them. #NotEvenSorry
14. Badgers in captivity can make friends with the live rats they are fed and decide not to eat them and I’m pretty sure there’s a great name for a rock band in there somewhere. #maybe
15. Some modern day Vikings prefer campervans over Drakkars. #ConquerByConcrete
16. Apparently, “season it like salt Bae” is a now universal measurement and applies to adding nutritional elements (including animal medications) to any food. #maybe 
17. If you give your dog a giant cow bone and put an old shoe on one end and let your dog gnaw on said bone in your front yard, your neighbors will never walk on your side of the street again. #maybe
18. You know you’re too busy when running errands counts as going out. #OrImJustLazy
19. People that have an extreme avoidance to a food, like hating the smell of mayonnaise (25% of the US) , may suffer from ARFID (Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder) that has an underlying overstimulation to something in that food that triggers them. #Weird #OrTheyJustDontLikeIt
20. When atheists exclaim, ”Oh god!”, I remind them that it is no longer appropriate in the modern social convention to appropriate another’s culture or beliefs and wait for the bomb to go off. #IDontMakeTheRulesUntilIDo 
21. Hippopotamuses (or is it Hippopotami?) kill more people per year than lions, sharks, and bears combined. #NoLongerWantAHippopotamusForChristmas
22. According to my wife, she has to buy ice cream because of her condition, her body doesn't make enough ice cream so she has to buy it. #ThatsMyGal

What I Learned This Week - 08/08/25

1. Things I own that should not require a login to use but do: a car, a truck, a washing machine, a scale, an air fryer, a meat thermometer, and a watch. #SoonAToothbrush
2. Asking my wife to kiss my boo-boo doesn’t work on a poison ivy rash. #eewwww
3. My go to response when people ask me what I do for a living and I really don’t want to talk is now, “I do my best”. #ConcernedConfusedExpressions
4. Best response heard in a friendly meeting to the comment, “I bet you were dropped as a baby” is, “you’re assuming I was ever held”. #RightInTheFeels
5. The biggest lie 80’s and 90’s sit-coms taught me is that there would be time for friends/family to come over for breakfast before the work commute. #DidTheyStartAtNoon
6. I discovered this week that my staff has a running log of how many times they’ve individually tried to stump me over the past year and a half with a Dad Joke that I had not heard or couldn’t puzzle out and as of yesterday the tally is Lee: 276, Team: 4. #ImAJokeToThem
7. I’m at the point in my life that I don’t check if my texting or voice to texting is spelled correctly because the things autocorrect comes up with are far more hilarious or lead to funnier conversations. #NoIDontHaveTourettes #ManyTimesImAnIdiot
8. ChatGPT defined this ongoing list as “Casual Nihilism in a Cardigan” and I think I found my new slogan. #maybe
9. A coworker received a bonus pop-tart in his morning bag of pop-tarts and was visibly sad because it meant someone else only received one. #RightInTheFeels
10. I’m at the age where I wake up more tired than I was when I fell asleep - so I'm now doing the math to find the length of time until I’m so tired that I’m permanently asleep. #SleepThoughts
11. I firmly believe in the theory of multiple dimensions - because it's the only logical explanation for where twist ties disappear after I open a loaf of bread. #WhereElseWouldTheyGo
12. If dogs were to sweat like humans, I’m pretty sure they would not have been domesticated. #UnlessTheySweatedBooze
13. If I was being true to myself, I should rename my photo album of “Before” to “Selfies”. #KeepingHopeAlive
14. In 2009, GameStop made a training video to teach male employees how to talk to women and you can even watch all the cringe on YouTube. #UpSell
15. Bars that have karaoke nights, never have Disney tunes on their playlist and I believe they are alienating more than half the bar from hilariousness. #maybe
16.  AI inbreeding is occurring and I don't know why it's so shocking considering the race that developed AI. #MostlyAIArt 
17. "Scorigami" is a scoring combination that has never happened before in a sport or league's history, and I don't know why this is important. #BettingOdds
18. The sign of a good vacation is not knowing what day it is and apparently this is also the same concept as "retirement". #SoImTold
19. The child of a mermaid and a centaur has an equal likely chance of being either a normal human or a sea horse. #Genetics
20. According to a consultant, the "H" in "Engineering" stands for "Happiness". #YesItDoes
21. After much deliberation with a coworker and consultation with my wildlife biologist daughter, I confess that I use a hamster to perform daily activities because a mouse would have a tail. #maybe