What I Learned This Week - 3/21/14

1.  There is a female artist that uses vomit as her prime media….I had no idea I spent a part of last week in a new art class.
2. The US Government has developed “time distortion” pills that are intended to be used on prisoners to make sentences feel even longer and curb some minor behavioral issues. I was probably a test subject for these in college under the guise of “Architectural History”.
3. Best comment from my youngest this week, “her name should be Fire Detector because she’s loud and annoying”.
4. Interoffice memos with Atari release references instead of actual dates cement the fact I’m in the right profession.
5. No matter the time of day or how much they've eaten, my dogs are always excited for a cookie (dog biscuit). I'm pretty sure they get it from me.
6. There is no graceful recovery from entering the pool via pratfall and severely bruising your coccyx.
7. Best comment from my middle daughter this week, " God created the world in 7 days...well it took 9 months to create me -  so clearly I’M a big deal."
8. After explaining the difficulties of finance and time management as one gets older to my oldest she replied with another question that I cannot answer, "Why would I ever want to grow up?"
9. Netflix is insomnia's best friend.
10. According to one of my daughter's friends, you CANNOT charge your iPhone in the microwave. So don't even try it.
11. I'm fairly certain a computer geek will print out every possible outcome of the NCAA bracket and develop a script to automate the entries just to win the Quicken Loan's/ Warren Buffett's billion dollar prize. I'm pretty sure they'll be disappointed when they read the fine print.
12. Patton Oswalt Is the newest Agent Of SHIELD....and that makes me uncomfortable.
13. Go-Pro cameras are mounted to tanks to capture hits/misses in Syria. I have no idea why that surprises me.
14. Maine is the closest U.S. state to Africa.
15. Russia has a larger surface area than Pluto, which is the main reason Pluto was demoted from "planet" status.
16. Saudi Arabia imports camels from Australia.
17. Hippo milk is pink. It is not strawberry flavored.
18. The toy Barbie’s full name is Barbara Millicent Roberts.
19. Not once in the Humpty Dumpty nursery rhyme does it mention that he’s an egg. I feel that's an important oversight.
20. France was still executing people with a guillotine when the first Star Wars film came out.
21. The difference in time between when Tyrannosaurus Rex and Stegosaurus lived is greater than the difference in time between Tyrannosaurus Rex and now.
22. At the time you were born, you were briefly the youngest person in the entire world.
23. Every two minutes, we take more pictures than all of humanity did in the entire 19th century.