What I Learned This Week - 3/28/14

1.  I did know Tabasco is made by one family, I did not know they made it on their own island.
2. In 1938 Ruth Wakefield invented America’s most famous pastry – the chocolate chip cookie.
3. Scientists have recently learned that the Narwhal’s tusk (the unicorn horn thingy) is used to sense changes in their environment helping them seek out food or more importantly – mates.
4.  There is such a thing as a “brain orgasm”. Scientifically known as, “Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response” creates a tingly and calming sensation, and no one knows why.
5. If you eat forty tablespoons of cinnamon at once, you will most likely die of benzaldehyde poisoning.​
6. According to the latest budget documents, the Pentagon plans to spend $58.7 billion of its $495.6 billion budget on secret or “black” projects. I’m sure the real number isn’t close to that.
7. A 30,000-year-old virus was recently freed from its icy Siberian grave by scientists. Not only was it the largest virus ever discovered, it was still alive and capable of killing amoebas. It appears the plot of several Michael Chrichton books are just starting in real life.
8. “Hatebeak” is a black metal band with three hit singles and 4,600 fans on MySpace whose lead singer is a 25-year-old African Grey Parrot named Waldo. They had me until “MySpace”.
9. Scientists have proven that the “bell-curve” of human performance is a myth. The majority of people actually fall below the mean. I don’t understand math by their definition (mean=average – how can the average be below the mean?) – So, I apparently prove their point.
10.  Flamingos stand on one leg to regulate body temperature. There are more plastic lawn ornament flamingos in existence than live birds exist. I’m pretty sure there’s a link between the two causing “climate change”.
11. Pixar has not announced a sequel to “The Incredibles” is in the works, but sadly they are making “Cars 3”.
12. I have to remind my wife, more times than I should at this point of our marriage, that introverts don’t get ready for a party - they gather strength for a party.
13. Now that we own the movie, “Frozen”, I understand a majority of the humming and jokes from the last four months. I’m pretty cutting edge.
14. Jokes about the Columbia Music house are completely lost on my kids. Likewise for “Freedom Rock” references.
15. After 17 years of marriage, my wife is still embarrassed to do certain things around me….and they are not at all what one might think.
16. Dogs cough…..and when done at 3:00 am will drive a house into panic.
17. Bob Barker is a black belt in karate and trained under Chuck Norris for eight years. That knowledge makes a scene from “Happy Gilmore” that much more funny.
18. People of the Interwebs lost their collective minds this week with the reveal of a cupcake ATM in New York City. Apparently, I’m the only one