What I Learned This Week - 9/23/16

1.  447 days until Star Wars - Episode VIII is in theaters.
2. There is no cool way to chase a ping-pong ball across the floor.
3. Everything sounds a thousand times more powerful with the word “industrial” in front of it. #IndustrialCottonBall
4. Taking a nap to get rid of a headache is the equivalent of turning the computer on and off again. #BioHacking
5. You never appreciate a working tongue until you burn on scalding liquid.
6. Most twins do not realize one of them was not planned. #PointingFingers
7. My kids do not understand why we use the phrase “hang up the phone”.
8. Sleep aid companies need to team with toothpaste companies to minimize steps in bedtime rituals.
9. 50% of Canada is the letter “A”. #EhMysterySolved
10. I’m not sure how to tell if a dog needs glasses or is just lazy.
11. According to my middle child, if you punch yourself and it hurts, you are not strong or weak, just stupid.
12. Heat sensitive paint on motorcycle exhaust pipes is this generation’s Hypercolor shirts.
13. According to my kids, if you wait long enough to make dinner, everyone will just have cereal.
14. “Deep-Fried-Jello” is a thing.
15. In 1943, the U.S. Supreme court ruled that no citizen is required to make any gesture of respect to the U.S. Flag or National Anthem. #PatriotismIsNotMandated
16. Erin the E-surance mascot (pink-haired animated woman) had to be retired because people on the internet would not stop making porn of her. #EasyToDraw
17. Made famous by their bad chicken wings and “exceptional” wait staff, Hooters in China is known as "American Owl Restaurant". 
18. There is a direct correlation in the decline of the Spirograph and the rise in gang activity. #Maybe
19. Apparently, “LMAO” is the acronym for “Let Me Ask Obama”. #NoIWont
20. There is a fungus that literally turns ants into zombies; the fungal spores take over the ant brain and gives the ant specific tasks to execute before it dies. #ButTheyAreFungis