What I Learned This Week - 11/4/16

1.  405 days until Star Wars - Episode VIII is in theaters. 
2. No one can explain to me where the “K” comes from when the nickname for “Nicolas” or “Nicholas” is spelled “Nick”. #HaNickName #ExtraPotassium
3. The interwebz has a theory that Donald Trump has several Horcruxes, starting with his hair, moving to his tax returns and extending to possibly a VHS of Home Alone 2.  #TheyAreOnToSomething
4. Eating cereal in the shower doesn’t save as much time as you’d expect. 
5. You can establish dominance at the urinal by softly whispering the lyrics to the Oscar Mayer theme song while never breaking eye contact with the person next to you. #AlphaMale
6. The best salesperson ever was the first woman to shave off her eyebrows then draw them back on and convince other women to do it.
7. Whenever a coworker sets a box of donuts on the table in front of me, my first thought is that I’d totally win at a donut eating contest with this bunch. #ExceptMaybeJake
8. “I’m going to make you a sandwich” is a dream phrase to be uttered from a wife to a husband until the wife says it when she is angry. #NoDontEatIt
9. Gatorade should stop pretending it's a sports drink and admit the main consumers are people that are hungover.
10. Apparently I use a yoga pose by just putting on socks, it’s called, “The Folded Walrus”. #Flexible
11. Not all people believe it's possible to read something you don't agree with on the interwebz and simply move on with your life – they know it, they just don’t believe it.
12. The “Twelve Days of Christmas” begin in October and each day is a logarithmic function. #Maths
13. According to my daughter after reading last week that the voice inside my head does not sound like me means it is possible someone actually thinks in my voice. #Creepy