What I Learned This Week 8/18/23

1.  No matter what form of electronic communication my mom uses (texting, chat, etc) that shows her name, she always has to sign off letting me know that "this is mom". #PrettySureIKnow 
2. Etymology reveals that words that start with "Pt" indicate a word that has a Greek origin making me question why my friend's name isn't "Ptimothy". #CallingHimPuhTimNow
3. If you refer to a book as "a wireless, anti-glare, battery-free Kindle" your intern will just stare at you.  #StillProcessing
4. Interns that refer to you as "my liege", no matter how sarcastically, will get a pretty good letter of recommendation. #maybe
5. There is a Star Wars book that is written from the perspective of events experienced by R2-D2, but it's only available in computer binary language. #ThatsFunny
6. The existence of the Triceratops implies the existence of the Tricerabottoms. #maybe
7. Best unexpected response to the meeting greeting, "How are you?" this week was "I am not in a Walmart parking lot physically right now, but I'm in a Walmart parking lot emotionally". #MeetingsOver
8. The word "homeowner" has the word "meow" in the middle of it and I can no longer read "hoMEOWner" correctly. #YoureWelcome 
9. Some days I think my wife only married me to break down Amazon boxes.#SoManyBoxes
10. My college sophmore daughter has bouts of being five with bedtime comments such as "If the moon was made of chicken strips would you eat it?" and this gives me both pause and joy. #TotallyWouldEatIt
11. I'm at a new phase of my life with texting my older daughters and it can be broken down to three basic categories, (1) me texting memes from their childhood, (b) them asking for a recipe, or (iii) them asking if I've ever used a french butter dish. #Fact
12. Apparently CD stands from the 90's are making a comeback as chic ramen holders and I'm regretting the contents my last garage sale. #SoMuchRamen
13. It has taken me 24 years to realize that in the movie The Matrix, when the star, Neo, has to accept a cookie before he enters the Oracle's room, that was a telltale clue he was in a virtual environment. #AcceptAllCookies
14. This week's winner of best pet name for a tortoise is, "Jennifer Slopez". #Amazing
15. According to HR, it's inappropriate to laugh when a coworker berates another coworker with, "If your ideas were a car, they would be a Yugo!". #HeWasntWrong