What I Learned This Week - 9/8/23

1.  More Teslas have caught fire than Ford Pintos. #NoNHTSAInvestigation
2. An improperly installed hubcap will stay attached to a car for 548 miles of a 566 mile journey. #SorryJayne
3. When dropping off a daughter at college, quoting the line from Monica in Yellowstone, “If it doesn't make you cry to watch your family ride away, you probably shouldn't have one”, does actually make things better. #HappyTears
4. Squirrels in Grand Teton National Park have perfected ways to torture dogs. #Hilarious
5. "No generators allowed" In camping loops appears to be more of a suggestion than a rule. #SoVeryLoud
6. There are few simple joys greater than receiving a text from my wife that reads, "You should get some bourbon". #HalleluiahChorus
7. My wife has confirmed that Kentucky Mules are better in a tin cup. #Fact
8. Best t-shirt in a National Park visitor's center goes to the old woman wearing a shirt that read, "I'm not responsible for what my face does when you talk". #MeToo 
9. Best sign in a National Park visitor's center goes to "Bear spray does not work like bug spray. Read the instructions". #WhatHappened
10. I overheard a child at a campsite refer to cauliflower as ghost broccoli and I can't find fault in it. #GhostBroccoliFTW
11.  My old dog figured out if she limps just a little she doesn't have to go for a walk. #faker
12. According to a coworker, a grocery receipt makes a good facsimile of a parking ticket to put on your windshield so you can park illegally without actually getting a ticket. #UsingAllHerBrain
13. There's a hurricane named after me and I'm not as interested as I probably should be. #Cat4
14. "Caffeinated Cup of Noodles" is a thing, and I'm pretty sure it's a sign of the coming apocalypse. #Eww
15. Apparently eating an entire bag of potato chips by yourself in one sitting is called a "Snaccident". #Maybe
16. Google Chrome is 15 years old and I don't know what to do with this information. #HBChrome
17. Ice Creameries with indoor slides don't like me on the slide. #Maybe
18. After sanding and painting my deck for almost two months, I'm pretty sure it's a Möbius strip.#NeverStops
19. People stopped asking me Star Wars questions in meetings when I responded, "I fell in love with Star Wars when Darth Vader lost his cool in a staff meeting and started choking a coworker across the room". #MeetingGotSilent
20. I'm at that point in my life that I routinely google symptoms of Alzheimer's to see if any of the links are already purple. #SoFarSoGood
21. According to a lady in the store, "Lunchables are just charcuterie boards that only got their GED". #SickBurn